When a man loves a woman...

Husband
R U going to the Gym today?

Wife
I plan on it. I thought we would have leftovers for dinner tonight, but there was nothing leftover. Are there alot of Marie Callendars left in the freezer?

Husband
Yes

Wife
Why do you ask about the gym?

Husband
So I can go see my girlfriend

Wife
Ill chop your weenus off

Husband
How's Mr. thing next to you been acting?

Wife
like a little bitch

Husband
Do you want me to kick his ass?

Wife
If I said yes, would you?

Husband
anything 4 U

Wife
oh gawsh, what do you want?

Husband
U, like the other morning